Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

In honor of the Royal Wedding today, I decided to post my very own sketchy York encounter...

Two days ago, I was coming off the train from London, exhausted and walking like a zombie. I figured that since I was in the city anyway, I would do some shopping. It was good - I bought a pair of shoes (for £18! a bargain if I do say so myself) and a ton of groceries. Thus laden with bags and my travelling backpack, I proceeded to look for the bus stop home.

As my friends at Uni will attest, the bus stops for the number 44 are notoriously inconvenient and difficult to find and I always get lost looking for it. So as I was wandering the streets, squinting at bus stop signs, cursing under my breath, and feeling like my arms were going to snap off (I must have looked like a raving homeleses person) some guy stops me. He was in his late mid 30's and I was not pleased to be interrupted, especially since he most likely was a tourist looking for directions (York is swarming with tourists this time of year).

"Excuse me, I'm sorry to bother you but I was just wondering where you were from."
"The United States."
"Oh really? What are you doing in York?"
"I'm taking a term here."
"What are you studying?"
"English literature"
"Right...because the Americans need to learn English too, right? Hahah..."
Not funny, mister. I want to go home.
"Listen, I know you probably get this all the time, but I think you're incredibly beautiful."
Yeah? Save the pick-up lines for some other miserable soul who doesn't feel like her arms are being dragged to the pits of the earth.
"Do you - do you mind if I kiss you on the cheek?"
What? What the heck did he say? Before I could react, I received a whiskery kiss.
"I know you probably get this all the time, but I was wondering...would you like to go out for coffee sometime?"
Um...
"I just think you're so beautiful and I just had to ask."
Ok, if you hadn't said the word beautiful twenty times already I might actually believe that this. I sputtered something lame like, "I'm really busy."
He looked crestfallen. "It's only a cup of coffee..."
"Yeah, well I'm really busy, I'm really sorry" I said, rambling with gusto. "I'm sure there are other more beautiful girls in the future you can take to coffee."
"Well beauty is in the eye of the beholder isn't it, and I think that you're - "
I shook my head vigorously before he would say the word "beautiful" again for the umpteenth time.
"Alright, well have a good day," he said and waved cheerily.

I spun around on the spot a couple of times before picking a direction and going. Interestingly enough, it turned out to be the right way and I made it to the bus stop without any further incident. Thank god.

***

Thought for food: Tell someone they're beautiful today (without being sketchy about it). Be sincere and genuine. :)

Rice Cake Pizza
This has nothing to do with beauty except that it looks mighty beautiful to me when I'm hungry! I spent hours looking for a gluten free pizza dough recipe but when my brother came to visit me, we just whipped this up with whatever I had in my cupboard. And it tasted even better than real pizza.
Ingredients
4 rice cakes
2 vine ripe tomatoes
1/2 onion
salt
1 tablespoon of oregano
1 tablespoon of thyme
black pepper
3 mushrooms
100g chevre blanc goat cheese
To Cook:
1. Slice tomatoes and onion to saute in olive oil. Add salt and allow to simmer on medium-low until tomatoes have turned mushy. Add oregano, thyme, and black pepper. Spoon into a bowl. Preheat oven to 350 degreees Fahrenheit.
2. Lightly saute mushrooms in a little salt until water has been released.
3. Using a butter knife, use the tomato sauce to cover the rice cakes. Then add thin layers of cheese. Top with mushrooms and more herbs to taste.
4. Pop everything into the oven and bake only until the cheese begins to melt - about 5-10 minutes.

Serves 2.

Flirty Lamb Stew

When I first moved in to my room at the University of York, I was exhausted. I hadn't gotten any sleep for 42 hours, had to sit next to and talk to a guy who justified the actions of the Virginia Tech killer on the plane, and had to drag my two suitcases across town (a walk that took about 45 minutes).

So when I open the door, I was hoping for home sweet home. Or at least home sorta home. What greeted me was a tenement style house, with a kitchen where clean dishes were extinct and a window that was covered in greasy fat.
Welcome to England!

Of course, I soon learned that England is NOT all like this at all. Apparently, the guy who used to live in my room was teased so badly that he had to move out. The other kids in the house, in wild partying mood no doubt, threw food at his window. (Incidentally, I learned that this was not an anomaly in this house. Apparently the boys subscribed to a "If it sticks to the wall, it's done" rule for cooking. So there are noodles on the walls of the kitchen as well.)

Then one day, I walked in and found my chopping board out of its cupboard in the middle of the kitchen, with a knife through it. The handiwork of one Mike who carried around a huge beer mug bearing the image of Mr. Grumpy. Needless to say, I was freaked. I went straight to the college administrator and begged her to move me out. I went back to my room and triple locked my door.

So in this harrowing experience, as most harrowing experiences do, a romance began to blossom. Ok, so maybe not blossom. Maybe not even feebly poke its head out of the ground. But I like to pretend it did.

He was always smiling. When I walked in, he'd say "Hiya!" as if it were the first time I saw him. When I walked out, he'd say "See ya!" with a smile that would charm the paws off a cat.

One weekend, when everyone else had either gone home or were sleeping, he and I talked in the kitchen for a long time. He was from the Lake District, the beautiful English countryside famed for inspiring poets and writers. He had an older sister and he played the guitar. He loved slack-lining and rock climbing and had a boyish charm. And when I confided in him that I was going to move out because Mike was freaking me out, he shook his head and said "Do you want me to have a go at him?" That did it for me. I fell for him hard.

And when I bought some organic lamb to make some lamb stew and he happened to be hanging around the kitchen, I offered him some. He was properly amazed and grateful and said that it was the best meal he had eaten since he had arrived at college. Not surprising, given how full of frozen foods the refrigerator seemed to be.
Alas, I moved out of that room to a much bigger and safer one elsewhere in the college. Now I have my own bathroom and shower and don't have to deal with knife wielding Mr. Grumpies.

As for my fling? I like to think that the taste of my lamb stew still lingers upon his tongue and that on lonely weekends, he still thinks of me.

Flirty Lamb Stew Recipe
Ingredients
2 lb lamb chops
3-4 cups of water
1 onion, chopped
2 stalks of celery, chopped
1 carrot, chopped
1 vine ripe tomato
1 tablespoon of ginger, finely minced
1 spring onion, chopped
Salt
Pepper

To cook:
1. Bring water to bubble in a dutch oven and let lamb chops simmer for 2-3 minutes. Drain, and refill the pot with water, lamb chops, and ginger. Let stew for half an hour.
2. Add onions, celery, carrots, tomato, salt and pepper to taste. Let stew for another half an hour on low-medium heat.
3. Add spring onions and let it simmer for 10 minutes.
Serves 4

(Photos to come, as soon as I can find out how to upload photos on British computers!)